Ok I'll bite. You can give this a try.

Code:
External_Function WNetGetUser "WNetGetUserA" MPR.DLL Pointer lpName Pointer lpUser_Name Pointer lpLength Returns DWord


//****************************************************************************
// $Module type: FUNCTION
// $Module name: Network_User_Name
// $Author     : AK/VOO/KCR
// Created     : 09-24-96 @ 19:17
//
// Description
//    This function reads the current username Of windows and returns that
//    name or an text unknown user
//
// $Rev History
//  02/22/2012  Ask Windows how long the size of the name should be
//  07/25/2003  Replaced obsolete code
//  09/24/1996  Module header created
//****************************************************************************
Function Network_User_Name for cDesktop Returns String
    String sName
    Integer iRetval iLength


    Move 0 to iLength
    Move (WNetGetUser (0, 0, AddressOf (iLength))) to iRetval
    ZeroString iLength to sName
    Move (WNetGetUser (0, AddressOf (sName), AddressOf (iLength))) to iRetval


    If (iRetval = NO_ERROR) Begin
        Function_Return (CString (sName))
    End
    
    Function_Return "User Unknown"
End_Function